Dressing My Depression

When I was a kid; I wasn’t really into getting “dressed”. My parent’s finances were limited so there wasn’t a lot of option to get what was current or in style. I also was the youngest of 4 children so hand-me-downs were essential to my closet. I was also always a chunky gal for my age so there was the issue of shopping in older women stores because at the time “plus size” clothes for little girls was not an option.

In 2006 I met a guy through my husband (who was my boyfriend or something like it at the time) who had a keen sense of fashion. He gave me the once over one day and bluntly told me I needed a makeover. The gall right? Now, if I were any other woman I probably would’ve have rightly pitched a fit. But I knew he was right. Depression and motherhood was kicking my butt. I didn’t have the energy to focus on how I looked outside of my sweats and t-shirt look. This look didn’t do much except get me hit on by a lot of lesbian women who thought I was a stud because of my short hair and labrae ring.

I let this said guy friend go to the store with me and pretty much dress me. He picked out dresses, jewelry, shoes and even sunglasses. I brought all that stuff home unsure of what to do next. I wasn’t working at the time and because I was in school I spent most of my time in scrubs. As I began to venture out more and go on dates a bit more I found a way to apply this new wardrobe.

Now, my weight was going up and down around that time and then I got pregnant with my middle child a year later. After birth, my breast were significantly larger, and so was my gut. To top it off my depression was once more taking me for a ride. Amazingly, when I got myself dressed I began to feel better. And that’s when it dawned on me that there was a direct correlation between dressing myself and my depression.

When I felt shabby I tended to dress shabby; and that still applies to me now. However, over the years with the increase of plus size stores and boutiques and the options available it has given me a creative way to cope when I am feeling blue. If you’ve struggled with depression then you know just how difficult it can be to even throw on a pair of pants let alone get fully dressed.

I find that when I look good, I feel better. Does this mean I am dressed to the nine everyday? Not likely. After all, I still have children and life to contend with. But do I take more of an interest in how I dress myself  over these last few years? Absolutely. Especially since I’m at my largest weight right now. It’s that much more important to me. So while I’m traversing this hypothyroidism , Hashimoto’s thyroiditis thing; I plan to do so in absolute style!

tutu

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